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D.I.C.K. – Dynamic Intervention Contraceptive Karrier

Friday, September 7th, 2012

The D.I.C.K., or Dynamic Intervention Contraceptive Karrier, is Off The Grid Concepts’ high speed, low drag, ultra resilient condom carrier. Available in multiple mounting solutions, which allow for attachment to a MOLLE compatible platform and a regular belt, for “”low pro” urban operations”. Available in a staggering selection of colors: Black, Coyote, Hawt Pink, Blood Red, Wolf Grey, Zombie Green, OD Green, Purple Rayne, and Safety Orange.

You can buy yours from offthegridconcepts.com.

Huge hat tip to breachbangclear.com

Sexy Patriotism Contest – Breach-Bang-Clear

Wednesday, June 27th, 2012

Breach-Bang-Clear is holding a new contest on their Facebook page with plenty of prizes, including all kinds of kit and cash for the number one submission! Here are the rules verbatim for those interested:

Breach-Bang-Clear Sexy Patriotism Contest. Here are the rules:

1. Applicant FEMALES must send us a sexy, patriotic picture (to breachbangclear@gmail.com, not posted on the page). Pictures must abide by the Facebook regulations regarding nudity to be eligible to win (though we might post the R rated ones on our blog). No trans-testicled or cross-dressers please, that’ll be a different contest strictly for people who watch MSNBC.

2. If the flag is involved – don’t be a dumbass. It’s our flag. Be respectful. We shouldn’t have to tell you that.

3. Somewhere in the picture applicants must have the words Breach-Bang-Clear or BreachBangClear.com. In lipstick, holding a sign, in steam on the bathroom mirror, fake a tattoo, whatever. Get creative.

4. Pictures should be e-mailed to BreachBangClear@gmail.com NOT posted on the wall. They should be sized at least 6 x 8 (minimum). Your e-mail submission should clearly state the name of the model (will not be published) and contact information, as well as a statement for our records that she is at least 18 years of age.

5. Prizes will include: a cash prize for 1ST Place, along with first pick of the gear prizes, plus gear prizes for 2nd and 3rd place. (Gear can go to the winning models or we’ll send it to guys that can use it on her behalf if she doesn’t want it).

6. Pictures must be submitted NLT midnight Mountain Time 04 July 12, after which our viewing audience will judge the winners with a poll or number of likes or whatever.

7. Applicants must be FEMALE. You can have more than one in the picture if you’d like, but no matter how many you have in there they all have to have fun bags and the right plumbing.

Here’s the link again in case you missed it: https://www.facebook.com/BreachBangClear

Breach-Bang-Clear Is Now On Facebook

Saturday, June 2nd, 2012

Breach-Bang-Clear and everybody’s favorite little operators the Mad Duo now have a Facebook fan page! Additionally, they’re running a couple of contests to win some awesome stuff, and who doesn’t like awesome stuff, amirite? So go like them already!

Real Steel Blu-ray reviewed over on UTR

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

Under the Radar ran a review by the Mad Duo today, covering the recent extended Blu-ray version of Real Steel. Not sure why they’re doing more there and on other sites than their own, but if you haven’t seen that movie (or even if you have) you might get a laugh out of the write-up. Or not.

Tell you one thing they’re right about for sure. Having some of those robots cammied up and equipped for a mission with USSOCOM would be a bad ass sequel.

Read the review.

The Mad Duo reviews Real Steel on Under the Radar.


Jeremy Horton Up to His Usual Tricks

Saturday, January 7th, 2012

Jeremy Horton of Tennessee-based Horton Knives put up a few pictures of his latest creation a couple days back (on Facebook). As

New Jeremy Horton folder: as you can see, Jeremy is a man who rarely misses a manicure.

Tactical Fanboy: Horton Knives
usual, it looks bad ass, and as usual the work looks to be imminently suitable for EDC (Every Day Carry). Just out of curiosity, what do you guys out there use for EDC? Gun, knife, keys, surgical gloves? Condom, nail file, OC spray? Whatcha got?


There’s still time at 1MOA…

Monday, January 2nd, 2012

As you’re aware, we’ve been doing the 12 Days of Tactical Christmas along with Soldier Systems Daily and the BOLO Report (today was Day #9, in case you’re not paying attention). There are others out there though, like the bad ass Dalton Fury “Kolt Racer Raynor” prize package, but that’s already done. You know what you can still get in on though? The 1MOA Solutions 1047 giveaway. According to the Mad Duo, it’s still open (though not much longer). Better get your ass moving and get the pictures submitted. Hell, some of you (especially you grunts) can probably do something really epic despite the lateness (and darkness) of the hour.

Better get to it.

1MOA Solutions: great training, great gear, great giveaway

Tactical Fanboy: You've got just a little time left to get in on the 1MAO 1047 Contest!









GI Joe Retaliation: The Mad Duo Has Concerns

Friday, December 30th, 2011

The Mad Duo has great hope for, and grave concerns about, the upcoming GI Joe Retaliation movie. The original article is over on Under the Radar, a further explanation of just how keenly they’re watching this is on Breach-Bang-Clear.

The Rock as "Roadblock" in the upcoming GI Joe sequel.

Tactical Fanboy: "Roadblock" in the upcoming GI Joe sequel.


We hope for their sake the Rock and Bruce Willis get this right. Hate to see what would happen if the Duo lost their temper.

The Mad Duo, of Breach-Bang-Clear

The Mad Duo: They fight evil so you don't have to.



Tactical Fanboy Gift Idea #7: RE Factor Loot

Saturday, December 3rd, 2011

Yes, #7. Why 7? Because their swag is just cool as hell. RE Factor Tactical.RE Factor, if you ask (and you will) means Relative Effectiveness as it pertains to TNT (which has an RE of 1). Other explosives are measured from there (in simple terms; there’s actually more to it than that).


MW3…a Different Sort of Review

Tuesday, November 22nd, 2011

“I want to see MW4 come out with a battlefield that’s 85% civilian, with 50% of those supplying the enemy with ammo and warning them when you get close. Also, shooting any vehicle, damaging any building or killing any civilian erases all your saved games and makes you start from scratch. Lastly, your loading screens are newscasts from home about how meaningless the next mission is and you have superiors second-guessing your every bullet in the After Action summary. Oh, and remove the tac-knife completely. Now that would be a wargame.” Luke B.

Read more of the Mad Duo’s article about MW3’s multiplayer play on Under the Radar.

Also, if you haven’t seen it, check out the Mountain Dew MW3 commercial.

Patriotic Boobs: Knockers for the Troops

Friday, November 18th, 2011

Reprinted with permission of Breach-Bang-Clear and the Mad Duo

Here’s something you don’t see every day (more’s the pity). There is a Facebook page with attendant website called Knockers for the Troops. We’ll post the link later because otherwise you won’t read our article, and we’re putting a lot of effort into this to risk being ignored.

It’s affiliated with the cartoon Power Point Ranger and, lest you think it’s just a large collection of boobs – and make no mistake it’s a large, superb collection of boobs – they sponsor a lot of military charity support by virtue of ad space and pimping pro-military organizations to their (not surprisingly substantial) we traffic.

Warning: this article will be discussing breasts. It will undoubtedly seem flippant but will hopefully not venture across the LOD into lewd. If you are easily offended or are a sissy crybaby that is going to complain we use the word boob and *gasp* show a picture of cleavage, feel free to stop reading now.

What we found interesting, other than the various wonderful sizes, shapes and colors of the subject matter, was the strong split in opinions from females. We figured there’d be a lot of catty responses, though nothing KftT posts is worse than PG13. There are forums of military spouses decrying it as soft porn and video responses complaining there aren’t similar website for female military personnel. The surprising thing is the number of women, including spouses and girlfriends, who do support the effort. Many of them are not only gracious enough to share their cleavage, they do battle with the naysayers openly and volubly, without concealing their faces and names. That’s pretty kewl.

For the opponents, we have the opinion you’d probably expect. If you’re worried about your significant other looking at PG rated cleavage shots on a good natured Facebook page, you have some relationship issues that are not going to be solved by pissing and moaning about it (especially if he’s deployed). If you’re going to whine that there isn’t a female-oriented counterpart site then create one. KftT was a private, “grass roots” bosom effort to begin with. No one is saying you can do the same thing.

In the end, we think the fuss is a little contrived and the support just to be expected. It’s easy to complain about something from here at home when you’re not subjected to the tyranny of the moment. If you’re freezing your ass off at COP Herrera watching guys from other places come in to get in a TIC so they can get their CABs and CIBs, looking at the pictures SOME GAVE ALL wall (which has quintupled in size over the last few months), you probably don’t give much of a shit that some overly sensitive dependent, officious marplot of a SNCO or an officer’s wife at the PX nail salon back in the states objects to you looking at cleavage on those few occasions the internet’s running good enough to upload a picture.

The rules give a pretty good idea of how tame these pages are:

·No nipples
·Nothing below the waist
·No ‘hand bras’
·No wet or see through T-shirts
·No pasties, real or computer generated
·No harassing ladies with creeper messages
·No celebs.
·No posting your e-mail
·No advertising your own page
·Must wear eyepro and safety belt at all times
·If you’re posting ex girlfriend pics you will be banned. First and ONLY warning

We give Knockers for the Troops a thumbs up, if only because the women there are doing something positive for the boys (and probably a handful of the girls). If you don’t like, it, don’t look at it. It isn’t much harder than changing the channel.

Besides,buxom boobaliciousness of this magnitude is just awesome. Get over it.

Join us over on Facebook to discuss…and remember, once we have enough people ask about it, we’ll tell you the tale of Naughty Nikki.

TIE Tactical Scabbards: TFB Tacticool Christmas Present Suggestion #11

Tuesday, November 15th, 2011

TIE Tactical (Tactical Innovations Engineering) has a new tiger strip pattern out. TIE makes some really nice custom kydex scabbards and sheaths for both fixed blades and folders (and of course some other things).

A TIE Tactical hatchet scabbard with belt lock for carry.

It’s not something you might think about right off, but they make some really nice belt scabbards even for folders. There are a number of reasons for this, including speed of presentation, carrying it on a battle belt, carrying a secondary folder, etc. The defensive/tactical reasons vary from individual, and will no doubt start more than one argument about what is valid, or a better way to carry, or whatever. This e-publication, perspicacious and sagacious as it is, will not get into that argument. We will going to say that TIE is run by an extremely nice, very detail-oriented and thorough man out of a small shop in Texas. He has a dual retention locking system if you want it (and these these things really do lock: you can carry ’em inverted and they’ll stay with you). He can make a number of different pieces you might want: for instance, we know of one commissioned project that involved a 5-round .38 speedloader for an airweight revolver sitting right next to a very small flashlight. Another was a small fixed blade (a SAR Global Tool Sarclops, as a matter of fact) next to a Zippo…you get the idea. He’s got the tools and he’s got the talent, and now he’s got the tiger stripe.

The Mad Duo previously wrote about TIE Tactical on Kit Up! if you want some background.

TIE Tactical's new Tiger Stripe pattern on a fixed blade.

Live Battlefield Gameplay…not too shabby!

Wednesday, November 2nd, 2011

Live action trailers and videos from first person shooters aren’t a new thing. They range in quality from really awesome to truly abysmal (though some of the latter are roughly equivalent to your average SyFy movie). Here’s one portraying Battlefield 3 from EGM Now (note that it was made before the game was released, apparently). Pretty good work for a home project filmed on a camera duct-taped to a bicycle helmet!

By the way, if you haven’t read it, the Mad Duo wrote a review of the BF3 campaign over on Under the Radar. Check it out.

Zombie Ammunition For Your Zombiepocalypse Loadout

Monday, September 26th, 2011

Hornady makes a lot of different types of ammunition… the latest bullet they’re allegedly coming out with is their own proprietary brand of Zombie-fightin’ ammunition. Now, despite numerous claims that it’s the real deal, to be released in 2012, we’ve got no formal or official confirmation from Hornady that they’re really doing it. It could always be a bad ass example of excellent photoshopping and a great idea. Anyway, if they are making this stuff, kudos to them. They’re going to sell a ton of them just for the novelty factor.

No word of course if this ammunition will be ballistically superior when applied to a living opponent, but pretty much any piece of metal hurtling into your head at several hundred feet per second while spinning too fast to see courtesy of proper barrel rifling is sure to be a Bad Thing.

In any case, it will be perfect for the Attack of the Zombie Hippies, right?

This article is credited to BreachBangClear.com

Talk Like a Pirate Day

Monday, September 19th, 2011

We almost missed it but our friends, the Mad Duo reminded us that today is Talk Like a Pirate Day.

It’s not too late to get in on the bloody, swashbuckling action. Today is International Talk Like a Pirate Day. Jib the jab, hoist the mainsail, whatever it is that pirates do. There’s a translator available to help, if you need it, and should you require greater inspiration, there’s a Facebook page. Feel free to talk like an old school pirate, but avoid speaking or looking like these guys:

You can also check the official Talk Like a Pirate official FLICKR photo stream. Be forewarned, not very many of them look like this:

If you like that, of course, you might like Hot Pirate Babes.

Thanks Guys!

Everybody do your part: Join Skynet!

Sunday, September 18th, 2011

Yes, you too could contribute to Skynet (not, according to its staff, the one that was supposed to kill us on April 19th).

The website says Have a computer? Want to help astronomers make awesome discoveries and understand our Universe? Then theSkyNet needs you! In fairness, this could be a great idea, but personally we think it sounds better if you read it with the voice of the narrator from the Starship Troopers movies.

Contribute to real scientific research and help scientists unlock the mysteries of our Universe!

Your computer is bored. It has spare computing power nearly all the time that could be used to do something cool. So why not let it? By connecting 100s and 1000s of computers together through the Internet, it’s possible to simulate a single machine capable of doing some pretty amazing stuff. That’s what the SkyNet is all about – using your spare computing power to process radio astronomy data.

The Skynet.

Nothing could go wrong here, right? It’s not like it could become self aware (Google will be doing that).

This article is credited to Richard Kilgore of breachbangclear.com.

Recycled Uniforms For DoD

Monday, August 15th, 2011

In accordance with a 2009 presidential executive order, the Senate has directed the Defense Department to look at uniforms made from recycled plastic bottles and other “formerly used consumer material”. The 2009 policy’s goal is that 95% of all new government contracts for items other than weapons be products or services that are “environmentally preferable.” This can take the form of nontoxic alternatives, products or procedures that don’t deplete the ozone layer and presumably granola-eating manufactory staff with a penchant for hugging trees.

Apparel made of recycled material is not new. The uniform company Cintas has been making hotel and casino staff uniforms of recycled bottles and apparently has a whole line of such recycled couture. Sports uniforms in South Africa have also been made from bottles retrieved from Japanese and Taiwanese landfills. Though it’s doubtful soccer players there must worry too much about IEDs, or need FR clothing, one hopes allowances would be made to keep military uniforms from melting onto a grunt’s skin.

Though it’s not widely known, the uniforms of some specialty units (like the Mobile Infantry) have been made from recycled soda bottles for years. Their MREs are all made of Soylent Green, too.

The Senate Armed Services Committee has asked DoD to report in time for items to be considered as part of the 2013 budget.

Authorship credits for this article goes to www.breachbangclear.com.
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Zombie Jerky: Questionably Cannibalistic Nutrition For The Apocalypse

Thursday, August 11th, 2011

It seems only fair; they eat us, why shouldn’t we eat them? Granted, the drying process is somewhat unpleasant (if not as unpleasant as carving the meat). A company called Harcos has been selling zombie jerky for a while now and they claim it’s mutagen free (so presumably eating it will not turn you). We don’t know what spices they use, nor whether it’s rubbed or marinated and frankly we’d rather not know. In any case, if you need a snack to augment your trail food or rat-f%&*ed MREs, try it out. They offer zombie blood power drinks as well, and have posted numerous testimonials. Rumors that the SADF is issuing Harcos Lyk Byt Biltong cannot be confirmed (see picture).

Authorship credits for this article go to www.breachbangclear.com.
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SEAL Team X Wants YOU!

Monday, June 20th, 2011

The Mad Duo

Conspiracy theories about the death of Bin Laden may abound, and deep sea divers with more optimism than common sense may be diving to find his body, but we’ll never know the identity of the trigger-puller who actually put metal to meat during the raid at Abbottabad…or will we?

Want to be known as the operator who killed the worlds most wanted man?

Visit eBay.

Yep, that’s right boys and girls. Hype Comics of Miami FL is releasing a comic version of the fateful raid in Pakistan, and if you bid high enough they’ll put your face on the operator who pulls the trigger at the moment of truth. You won’t me a member of DevGru though. You’ll be a shooter on Seal Team X.

“The auction winner will also receive a panel of original hand-drawn artwork with their character in action,” says Hype’s CEO Scott Owneby, “proudly autographed by the original artist.”

The auction began on June 13th and is scheduled to last until June 23rd. As of Friday the 17th there were six bids, the highest $250, a seemingly lackluster response but it’s still early.

“Anybody is welcome to bid,” states Ownbey. “The only requirement, due to pre-existing story considerations, is that the winning bidder be male.”

Seal Team X: The Blood of Bin Laden is scheduled for release as a digital comic book for Kindle, Nook, iPad and other devices with eBook apps. Apparently, Blood of Bin Laden is only the first in an entire SEAL Team X series.

Hype advises that they’ll be donating a portion of the proceeds to the DAV (Disabled American Veterans).

More about the contest here.

If you have any ideas for us to discuss, review or revile, visit us at Breach-Bang-Clear or FaceBook, or just e-mail us…unless you’re going to whine or complain about our opinions, writing style or philosophy in which case don’t bother. MAD DUO CLEAR!

Breach Bang Clear Seeking Zombie Stories

Friday, May 27th, 2011

Fancy yourself a writer of zombie fiction? Or maybe it’s not fiction at all but rather a tell all expose on our Government’s war on the undead, so long as those undead are hippies. Either way, Breach Bang Clear is seeking your story for their upcoming anthology, “Attack of the Hippie Zombies”. It’s a first for us too, combining the hippie and undead genres. Submissions should be 800 to 20,000 word (unless it’s so good and full of zombie killing, hippie stomping goodness it makes them want to make an exception) and should be set in the era between 1965 and the present.

Would-be authors will be donating their proceeds to support the Independence Fund and veterans who have suffered extensive traumatic injury. It’s for a good cause guys.

The rules get a little complicated so make sure you visit www.breachbangclear.com for full details.

Originally posted on Soldier Systems Daily.

BreachBangClear.com Shooting Drill Of The Month – May 2011 “Step Back Evil Anti-American Zombie Drill”

Tuesday, May 3rd, 2011

Mad Duo has decided to start a series of shooting drills, the first of which offers a target of a very Anti-American Zombie. This particular drill is available via PDF format on breachbangclear.com, and the collective [read: you] have been given full rights to use it for personal training applications. Remember proper firearms safety and handling while training, and that with zombies, headshots are always king. Have fun!

Major thanks to BreachBangClear.com for making this target and drill.

Mad Duo Reviews Drive Angry

Monday, March 14th, 2011

Drive Angry: Cleared Hot to Watch

Drive Angry is the 3D theatrical version of that old truism about mopeds and, uh, large women. You know the one we’re talking about. This flick is so utterly ridonculous, so over the top, it makes self-respecting grindhouse hang its head in shame—and that’s what’s so awesome about it. We know, you expected us to make fun of it, mock the script and gunhandling…and we would have, if the movie had taken itself seriously, but it doesn’t. Its nonplussed self-awareness conveys the sort of “I’m at peace with myself” vibe that hippy gurus, overpaid therapists and cannibalistic serial killers can only envy. You know from the first thirty seconds you’re in for an over the top ride and within ten minutes you’ll have either left the theater or you’ll be having the time of you’re life.

Frankly, we loved it, and if you enjoyed The Expendables, or movies like They Live or Big Trouble in Little China, you will too. However, if you want writing without clichés or realistic combat action, better skip it. Production values aren’t as good as The Expendables, but the cast is, and it’s way better than Machete…but the fact that we’re comparing it to both should tell you something. Pay attention boys and girls, we’re talking about a movie in which the protagonist engages in a gunfight while in flagrante delicto* with a white trash redneck waitress (who has predictably big store bought boobs), smoking a cigar and drinking Black Label at the same time. The fact that she never dismounts and he neither misses nor spills the whiskey despite an obscenely high bad guy death toll should tell you something about it.

* Attention, grunts reading this: this is a fancy way for us to say he was having sex with her. Note also that he was the one smoking the cigar and drinking, not her.

Nicolas Cage plays our protagonist, John Milton (yes, like Paradise Lost), the bad ass grandfather everyone thought was dead (because he was). He breaks out of hell (in black Oaklies, behind the wheel of a 1964 Riviera) by driving across a sort of post-apocalyptic version of hell obviously dreamed up collaboratively by Dante, John Carpenter, Nick Castle and the editor of Muscle Car Magazine. Hell behind and vengeance before him, Milton goes after the villain of the piece, rescues a waitress from her abusive boyfriend and persuades her to take him across country, drives several awesome cars and tries to avoid a pursing demon, all the while indulging in epic amounts of carnage and bloodshed.

Billy Burke does a good if not compelling job as the evil hillbilly satanic cult messiah Jonah King, whose congregation apparently consists solely of Jerry Springer Show castoffs and refugees from Appalachia. He wants to sacrifice Milton’s grandchild (who killed Milton’s estranged daughter after she performed an ad hoc penectomy on him) in a satanic rite and unleash hell on earth.

Amber Heard is easy on the eyes as the daisy-duke-shorts-wearing Piper, a brawling trailer trash princess, and she does carry her role off okay, but the best supporting actor is without a doubt William Fichtner. He just steals every scene he’s in. Fichtner is the dry, impeccably dressed, laconic Accountant, sent by Lucifer to bring Milton back. Whether effortlessly beating the trailer park bully to death or driving a gas truck through a highway patrol roadblock, he makes it all look easy. David Morse plays Milton’s old friend, and we give the movie additional kewl points for having him in it despite his limited role.

There are a few things in the movie we’d have wished were made clear, like the “godkiller” gun and how Milton wound up dead in hell in the first place. However, in our views such gaps aren’t sufficient to spoil the fun. Besides, they’re more than counterbalanced by such niceties as a 1964 Buick Riviera, a 1969 Dodge Charger, a 1971 Chevy Chevelle, boobies, a cane made from the femur of the villain’s previous victim, the assorted grisly fates suffered by oh so many cultists, laugh out loud one-liners, mounds of expended brass, unabashed bloodshed, more boobies, expended shells and more brass and indignantly bloodthirsty cops…Plus, big damn supernatural bullets with Deus Velox Nex on the side are just kewl.

Though the film starts out in Colorado and makes its way to Louisiana via Olahoma, the terrain throughout will be woefully familiar to any poor bastard ever been stationed at Ft. Polk. Note: the Colorado troopers may not have been too bright (the Accountant’s influence not withstanding), but the Oklahoma troopers actually seem kind of familiar. We particularly enjoyed the OHP Captain ordering them to “shoot at their tires”. Pretty sure he was teaching at a tracking course we attended at Camp Gruber back in the early 90s.

Anyhoo, we’re just not sure how better to describe this movie in comparison to other movies. Constantine meets Crank? Big Trouble in Little China meets the bastard love child of Desperado and Dusk Til Dawn? Maybe it’s a whole new over the top genre itself, but if you don’t expect anything serious or coherent then you should be able to sit back and enjoy it.

Much as you would a really big-boned sportin’ woman or a moped with flames painted on the side. Just don’t wanna to tell anyone about it. You are hereby cleared hot to watch.

Mad Duo Clear!

About the authors: The Mad Duo enjoys celebrity status in the action figure world and among those sheepdogs perspicacious enough to follow them. Iconic trigger-pulling pundits whose wit and witticisms have been described as the “literary equivalent of a .308 boat-tail to the head”, they offer commentary on everything from current events to the relative merits of tactical gear, TTPs and weaponry. Read them on SSD, their website Breach-Bang-Clear or on FaceBook. No sissies, pansies, Olbermann fans or Behar acolytes allowed.