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Mustached Veterans Wanted

Tuesday, November 8th, 2011

Some of our military friends have let us know that the American Mustache Institute wants to honor mustached US veterans this Friday. Yes, it sounds a little silly (and it is) but it’s funny too. They have a sense of humor that will resonate with military personnel and a reasonable lack of propriety. Anyway, they’d like to run a picture of the hairy-lipped veteran along with a vignette. That can be a personal recollection by the veteran himself (hopefully not herself) of it can be a 3RD person tribute to a friend, NCO, commander, spouse, brother, whatever. Needs to have a picture featuring that mustache!

“We want to take advantage of any opportunity we have to honor our military personnel and feature them on our site,” says Aaron Perlut of the American Mustache Institute. “Friend, coworkers, comrades in arms, spouse. Just have them e-mail me at info@americanmustacheinstitute.org.”

Please get submissions in by this Thursday, 1900 EST.

(Pictures: Col. Lewis Millet, retired, who earned the Silver Star in WWII and the Medal of Honor in Korea. A valorous man. Doubtful anyone could get away with such a mustache these days.)

For more on the American Mustache Institute:

Online: http://AmericanMustacheInstitute.org
Twitter: http://twitter.com/MustacheTalk
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/AmericanMustacheInstitute

Some Bumper Stickers Speak Volumes

Monday, November 7th, 2011

Love this bumper sticker. Of course, you’d be far better off sporting it here CONUS that you would on the back of one of the ubiquitous little white pickups or checkered taxis in Iraq. It’d be really cool on a jingle truck, but it wouldn’t be as funny because of the language. Guess it might look okay on the back of a jundi gun truck if they really had a sense of humor.

Live Battlefield Gameplay…not too shabby!

Wednesday, November 2nd, 2011

Live action trailers and videos from first person shooters aren’t a new thing. They range in quality from really awesome to truly abysmal (though some of the latter are roughly equivalent to your average SyFy movie). Here’s one portraying Battlefield 3 from EGM Now (note that it was made before the game was released, apparently). Pretty good work for a home project filmed on a camera duct-taped to a bicycle helmet!

By the way, if you haven’t read it, the Mad Duo wrote a review of the BF3 campaign over on Under the Radar. Check it out.

When $1 for Boobies Isn’t Enough

Wednesday, November 2nd, 2011

Looks like NAVSEA likes them twice as much. Makes sense since they come in pairs.

20111102-122030.jpg

Hooters is raising money for HOOC.E.F. The Hooters Endowment Community Fund’s Kelly Jo Dowd fund to help fight breast cancer.

Pitch in!

Water Bomb Squad

Wednesday, November 2nd, 2011

I guess we’d call this a textbook example of Aquatic Ordnance Disposal and how an operator properly disposes of an Improvised Water Device. Yeah, that sounds about right.

You can own a t-shirt with this image courtesy of Glennz Tees. Not hard to see why, since EOD is easily one of the most important jobs in the military today. Not to mention it is a pretty amusing image.

Glennz Tees – Water Bomb Squad

Weapon Safety: Your Trigger Finger

Sunday, October 30th, 2011

Trigger finger…it’s pretty damn important, as TFB readers prob’ly know. Not talking about tenosynovitis, though that probably sucks to have. One of the most famous cinematic examples of the proper employment of your primary safety (and make no mistake, your trigger finger IS your primary safety, along with properly trained muscle memory) was that scene in Blackhawk Down where Hoot says “this is my safety” and wiggles his trigger finger.

Edit: as Kyle just pointed out, another great cinematic example of the importance of trigger finger was that poor kid in the car in ‘Pulp Fiction’.

It never ceases to amaze me how many people are unaware of this simple, fundamental rule. Hollywood spends millions of dollars on gear and special effects, but they can’t hire any local E-2 grunt to tell them to keep their damn finger out of the trigger guard.

Oh well. If we’re going to look at an example of someone illustrating what not to do, she might as well be smokin’ hawt.

Covert & Disguised Weapons

Thursday, October 27th, 2011

ALCON: When we ran this post first thing this morning, we weren’t aware it originated at John Lindsay’s Don’t Even Reply. We’re happy to have been advised and you can bet we’ll now be frequent readers henceforth. Also, check out E-mails from an asshole.

ORIGINAL TEXT:

We got this as a forward from a very good friend who was one of the team that developed the 5.11 Tactical COVRT series, which we really like. (In fairness, he’s actually involved in almost all the tactical gear development and T&E at 5.11 Tactical…we must give him props for this. It’s a copy from a forum thread, apparently someone taking themselves just a little too seriously (or intentionally screwing with someone) and it’s just too damn funny not to share. Thanks for bringing it to our attention Big D, you’re all right (despite your ears and somewhat vacuous look!) 5.11 is lucky to have ya.

WARNING: Strong language. Be aware there is substantial profanity in this, particularly as the recipient of the e-mails grows increasing frustrated. If you don’t like the f-bomb or colorful invective offends you, skip this post and go someplace safer.

Disguised Weapons
Original ad:
**** Disguisable weapons wanted ****
Wanted: hidden blades, belt buckle knives, cane swords, etc…..
Offering: cash, items for barter

From Me to **********@***********.org:

Hey,

I saw your ad looking for concealable/disguised weapons. I have several fine-crafted items you may be interested in. Respond if you are interested and I will send you pictures and prices.

Thanks,

Mike

From Jeff ****** to Me:

I am. lets see what you got.

From Me to Jeff ******:

Jeff,

Here you go:

Looks like a normal spoon, right?

Wrong. It is actually a deadly 2.5″ half-smooth, half-serrated knife with tactical grip. One minute you are enjoying a bowl of cereal, and the next you are fighting off attackers with this deadly and disguised weapon.

I am asking $50 for the blade. Let me know if you want to stop by and take a look at it.

Mike

From Jeff ****** to Me:

that is stupid as hell and looks like crap. unless you have anything better to offer, dont waste my time.

From Me to Jeff ******:

Jeff,

I am sorry you feel that way about the spoon blade. I do have some other weapons that I think you will feel differently about.

Mike

From Jeff ****** to Me:

fine. but if it is another knife duct taped to a spoon then you can fuck off.

From Me to Jeff ******:

Jeff,

Thank you for re-considering. Here are three quality disguised weapons that I think you will love:

At first glance, this looks like a normal party cup. However, if you look close enough, you will see that it is really a fully automatic Glock 18C. You will be able to pour your enemies a nice warm cup of lead with this fine purchase. Asking $900 for the gun/cup combo.

Still thirsty for justice? Try this badass M16A2 disguised as a 24-pack of soda. The box has two finely crafted holes on each side to allow for any kind of optics (not included) that you wish to attach. This weapon is only for sale if you have a Class III permit.

This cleverly disguised weapon may look like a tissue box, but is actually a Benelli M3 12 gauge shotgun disguised as a tissue box. The ultra-soft quilted tissues serve as a comfortable grip on the pump-action shotgun. Also, if you find yourself sneezing during the heat of combat, you will have a handy tissue box ready for action. Asking $1500 for the weapon. Additional tissue boxes are an extra $5 per box.

Let me know if you want any of these items.

Thanks,

Mike

From Jeff ****** to Me:

youre a fucking dumbass, shitbrained, asswipe, retarded dipshit. you prob walk around with that shit too you dumb mother fucker. I hope you get hit by a car. fuck off, eat shit, and die.

Lumberjack Commandos

Thursday, October 27th, 2011

The most elite fighting force in the world. They go in Felling Axes and Crosscut Saws hot and run on nothing but flapjacks and pure testosterone. Trees of the world, prepare to meet your maker.

First Cav Gets Its Dork On

Saturday, October 22nd, 2011

Here’s what COB Adder looks from the outside on a bad day in 2009:

Here’s what it looks like on the inside, on a good day, when some of the Americans start getting their dork on:

Let’s be clear: no one is bagging on them for getting their dork on. WE get our dork on. We’ve been to the Inn of the Welcome Wench. We know our way around the Little Keep on the Borderlands, that Bree Yark isn’t nice and that you can’t trust Brian Van Hoose. That’s when we’re not trying to get the Leeroy Jenkins title, or collecting bottle cap currency.

It might be a little weird, being a junior enlisted man playing a role-playing game with a Captain as your “narrator” or “Dungeon Master” or “Game Master” (whatever), but hey – at least you’re slinging dice. Beats mind-numbing boredom (and getting shot at).

Frankly, we wish we could get in on a consistent game that played twice a week…though not enough to go back to the desert again.

Read the whole story of the First Cav and their fantasy gaming.

Short Bus Door Gunner

Tuesday, October 18th, 2011

High Speed Gear Inc. has a new morale patch out that will no doubt strike a chord with some folks – one has to wonder whether it will be more popular as a morale patch bought for themselves or purchased as a gift to reflect someone’s esteem for that short bus doorgunner every platoon, team or unit has. As HSGI says, Everyone knows a Short Bus Doorgunner. Available at HSGI for $5. One color only right now, but hopefully at some point we’ll see it in some more true camo color versions. Check out HSGI on Facebook.

Picture courtesy of NolaTac.com. Thanks fellas.

The Story Behind AFT’s New Gyrene

Monday, October 17th, 2011

As you may have already seen, the team at Action Figure Therapy have added a new character to their roster—at long last, a US Marine. One of the Soldier Systems-Tactical Fanboy eee-light writin’ unit of tactical bloggers caught up with Dan Bialek, the man behind AFT, and asked him for some details about the decision to add a gyrene to the mix. He told us there’d been calls for a Marine AFT character for a long time, that it was a foregone conclusion that they would add one…the question was how to do it.

“The decision for a Marine character took a lot of thought,” Dan said. “Obviously there was a lot of demand for it, and we try to listen to our fans, but we want to remain autonomous and not pander. That would ruin the series and we wouldn’t suit everybody anyway. We put two or three different posts up on Facebook…got between 150 to 300 responses at a time. [He laughs.] Some were constructive and some weren’t, some were printable and some weren’t.”

It might surprise a lot of AFT fans just how seriously the comedy team took the decision. It frequently does surprise people once they learn how much time goes into the AFT video process. Determining subject matter (frequently based on suggestions from their fans), writing the scripts, recording the audio, rerecording the audio if it doesn’t come out right… There is a lot to it. As simple, crude, at times brutally profane as the series is none of it is taken lightly, or written off-hand. They knew they had to get their jarhead right, because they’d only be introducing the new Marine once.

“We did a ton of research for the Marine charcter,” said Dan. “Watched a lot of documentaries, read a bunch, took everything everyone said or told us and took it all into consideration. We didn’t want to just throw together a hodge-podge of clichés, especially from a character from a branch of the service we’d never featured before.”

It was obvious Dan and his crew like the way the Marine’s personality and demeanor turned out.

“This character is always right, even if he knows he’s wrong. His ethos is that he’s always right…we wanted to reflect that attitude a lot of Marines seemed to express. They have this…it’s almost like they’re proud of living as hard and being treated as badly as they are…where they love the Corps but they know the Corps shits on them so f#*& the Corps but they love the Corps at the same time. It’s their Marine Corps.”

Watch the AFT video Semper Fidelis.

They must’ve done their research right, and their writing must’ve been more inspired than usual. The new AFT Marine video is on track to be their most popular video yet, and the ending is sublime.

“We were very proud of the ending…we thought it was clever and an accurate solution to the stereotype people expected. We didn’t want just that cliché. Jerry [Jerry, the voice of the Marine character] recorded the video one night and it was super funny, but I knew the voice wasn’t quite what it needed to be, so I called him and asked him to come back over and do the voice again meaner and louder. When he came back over he just sort of absorbed the character and we thought…people are going to like this character.”

Dan was right. A lot of people do like the Devil Dog and are standing by for his next diatribe. “Honest to God, dick blood and tears. Try it!”

If you’re interested, go over to AFT creator Dan Bialek’s Facebook page and download a free copy of his standup CD. Just click the “Free CD” tab on the left side of his page to get it. You should also watch their website and Facebook page for updates on seeing the AFT characters in person. They’re currently looking for CONUS bases (mostly in the southern California area, to start with) that might be open to letting them perform.

We’d like to thank Dan Bialek and his beloved, vitriolic cast for taking the time to talk to us and helping us reach us new heights in profanity.

“You don’t believe Marines are tough? We train our testicles to fist bump after every kill!”

Cover and Concealment

Saturday, October 15th, 2011

We’re not sure who started floating this picture around, and in fairness the guy with the gun is probably trying to pull the kid to safety…still funny though. Where do you suppose they are? We can’t get enough resolution to really read the patch nor get much of use from the breed of shotgun. Anyone have any ideas?

Wasteland Weekend: Get Your Mad Max On

Friday, September 23rd, 2011

It’s not too late to go visit the Atomic Café, Thunderdome, Wasteland Casino or Mushroom Cloud Lounge. With any luck you’ll have time to get a free mohawk.

Wasteland Weekend started today, but it goes through Sunday; it’s not to late to dunk your face in a bucket of fishhooks, throw some leather on, grab up your sawed off scattergun or crossbow and get down there. Go have some fun in the sun in the lovely Mojave Desert with the finest in fringe elements of a Mad Max loving subculture.

There are a lot of bands scheduled to be playing in addition to numerous events (an archery contest, Wasteland Games (including boomerang toss and gas can carry) plus, of course, multiple Thunderdome fights. There will also be some sort of sermon delivered around an ‘unexploded nuclear bomb’ on Sunday.

They are working toward an immersive environment. From the official website:
“Wasteland Weekend reserves the right to prohibit any vehicles, structures, or items it deems unfit for the look of the themed area. (Any unfit property can be stored outside the gates of the themed area in the general camping area or hidden from view.) We are trying to create a convincing 360-degree post-apocalyptic environment. We hope you understand.”

In addition to individuals, there are a number of “tribes” who will be in attendance. There are several, including the Petro Pirates and Dukes of the Nuke, but our favorite has got to be the Dystopian Slut Militia.

Wasteland Weekend is a relatively new post-apocalyptic event, but organizers expect it to be much larger than the 400 attendees they had last year.

One long weekend of booze, body piercings, pointy things, makeshift weaponry and metal, punk rock, industrial rock and cleavage. What’s not to like?

Wasteland Weekend

Talk Like a Pirate Day

Monday, September 19th, 2011

We almost missed it but our friends, the Mad Duo reminded us that today is Talk Like a Pirate Day.

It’s not too late to get in on the bloody, swashbuckling action. Today is International Talk Like a Pirate Day. Jib the jab, hoist the mainsail, whatever it is that pirates do. There’s a translator available to help, if you need it, and should you require greater inspiration, there’s a Facebook page. Feel free to talk like an old school pirate, but avoid speaking or looking like these guys:

You can also check the official Talk Like a Pirate official FLICKR photo stream. Be forewarned, not very many of them look like this:

If you like that, of course, you might like Hot Pirate Babes.

Thanks Guys!

First Warror Zone Opens In Fort Riley

Monday, September 5th, 2011

The Warrior Zone, which opened August 26th in Fort Riley, Kansas, is a 25,000 sq. ft., $10 million multi-purpose facility entertainment facility developed for use with the base’s personnel. It features 68 computers for gaming and general use, dozens of game consoles hooked up to 55-inch flat screen televisions, pool and poker tables, a 75-seat snack bar, full bar, theater and large conference room. A covered patio is also available outside with grills and a large fire pit. It looks like a great place to kick back and relax, and it also seems to be a great success; they’ve already extended the hours on Fridays and Saturdays to 0100.

Original story: blackanthem.com
http://rileymwr.com/warriorzone/

FUBAR 2: Empire Of The Rising Dead

Monday, August 22nd, 2011

I was at the Baltimore Comic-Con this weekend and I had the pleasure of seeing the FUBAR team for the second year in a row. For those not familiar with FUBAR, it’s a graphic novel zombie anthology series that takes place during WWII featuring a mix of different artists and writers for each story. The first volume, FUBAR: European Theater of the Damned covered the Nazi and Allied zombies in, appropriately enough, the European Theater.

This year, the FUBAR team has released FUBAR 2: Empire of the Rising Dead, taking place in the Pacific Theater, with plenty of zombified soldiers on both sides of the conflict. Despite being the second volume, it’s not linked to the European stories, so you wouldn’t miss anything story-related by skipping straight to FUBAR 2, although I suggest you get both; it’s an exellent series.

In addition to the graphic novels, there’s also a set of zombie targets available. Originally confined to just WWII zombie soldiers, the targets now include a Wild West Cowboy, Michael Jackson in Thriller, and my personal favorite, the Modern Operator (complete with Blackwater Logo, lol), among others. These come in two sizes: 11″ x 17″ and 24″ x 36″.

Finally, the FUBAR team is currently running a Kickstarter page to help with printing the second book. In exchange for your contribution, they’re offering everything from T-shirts to posters to both volumes of the book with custom sketches, depending on the size of your donation. You can donate here.

zombiefubar.wordpress.com

US Military Bracelets – “My Soldier Story” Contest

Saturday, August 20th, 2011

US Military Bracelets is offering a chance for you to win one of 30 Sterling Silver Military Emblem bracelets of your choice. All it requires is either a short Youtube video or paragraph explaining how you honor your courageous soldier or service. Other prizes include 20% off any single item purchase from US Military Bracelets or free engraving on a new US Military Bracelet.

For information submissions and guidelines visit usmilitarybracelets.com/contest .

Ahh, The Memories

Wednesday, August 10th, 2011

Here is last year’s “Making of” video for Hot Shots Calendar. Can’t wait for this year’s.

Black Market Goods Brewing

Tuesday, August 2nd, 2011

Designed to look like a bomb found on the black market, the BMG-10 bottles feature removable rear fins and include a hand-built crate with a bracing system for transportation. They’re only a conceptual piece right now, which is a shame since they’re actually pretty cool looking.

http://www.marcojohndesign.com/portfolio_black_market_goods.html

Captain America Propaganda Posters

Wednesday, July 20th, 2011

Commissioned by Mondo, the Alamo Drafthouse Cinema’s collectible art boutique, this is one of a set of four promotional posters made for the upcoming Captain America: The First Avenger. Created by Eric Tan and Olly Moss, the posters depict propaganda on the part of both Captain America and the main antagonist organization HYDRA. The posters are available in extremely limited quantities and apparently only at Comic Con, so if you’re not there, then you’re out of luck.

Hat Tip: Wired.com

Mondotees.com

Vinoflage – Grape Leaf Camo

Monday, July 18th, 2011

Available from Francis Ford Coppola Winery, this unique camouflage pattern was developed by Anahid Nazarian, Director of the American Zoetrope Research Library, while working on a film for Coppola. She got the idea from observing various countries’ camouflage patterns. After noticing that several patterns featured shapes very similar to grape leaves, Nazarian decided it would be a fun idea to develop camo constructed entirely of a grape leaf pattern. Besides the available apron, shirts with this pattern were also made available to Chris Morisoli, a 1st Lieutenant formerly stationed in Iraq. Originally one was sent to 1st Lt. Morisoli in a care package from Nazarian sent on behalf of the Coppolas. He liked it so much, and so did the men in his unit, that they donated additional shirts so every one of his fellow Soldiers could also wear them.

Francis Ford Coppola Winery – Vinoflage Apron

Coalition Forces VS Taliban and Insurgents Chess Set

Monday, July 11th, 2011

Jeffrey Train, former Master Corporal in the Canadian Army, came up with this series of chess sets, which showcase either American, British, or Canadian forces against Taliban or Iraqi Insurgents. Both sides feature the various classes of pieces in their own unique ways. For example, the American forces have ‘American Assault Soldiers’ for pawns, ‘American Heavy Gunners’ for knights, the World Trade Towers for Rooks, ‘American Snipers’ for Bishops, the Statue of Liberty for a Queen, and either George W. Bush or Barack Obama as the king. The chess sets can be purchased from Hedwig & Sergeant Major (click the image above) in these configurations:

Canadian VS Afghanistan Taliban Figures
American VS Afghanistan Taliban Figures
British VS Afghanistan Taliban Figures
American VS Iraqi Insurgent Figures
British VS Iraqi Insurgent Figures

A portion of the sales goes towards Canadian troops to help fund fun-runs and provide food for events in Afghanistan.

Hat Tip: The Star

Happy 4th Of July!

Monday, July 4th, 2011

Enjoy your Independence Day and all the beach trips, backyard barbecues and fireworks that come with it, but don’t forget what the day celebrates: the adoption of the Declaration of Independence by the Second Continental Congress. Of course the 4th also represents the denouncement of a lack of freedom and the practice of tyrannical oppression. In a remarkable coincidence, this day also marks the deaths of both John Adams and Thomas Jefferson in the year 1826. A little history lesson for you all.

Own The Bullet With Your Name On It

Sunday, June 26th, 2011

That’s the slogan of ‘My Bullet’, a company that allows you to custom order either a .50 rifle round or 20mm cannon round with a personal inscription. Both are available in either brass and silver, and can come packaged in a metal case, window case, wall plaque or shield. Also available is the ‘Bin Laden Bullet’, a pre-made .50 round engraved with the words ‘Osama Bin Laden’ and ‘Got him!’ on opposite sides. In all honesty, an engraved 5.56 would be more appropriate, but I suppose its the thought that counts.

My Bullet

Battle Mug

Tuesday, May 31st, 2011

It’s getting VERY hot here at the home office and one of the best ways to cool down is to take a big, cool drink. So, why not do it in style? Featuring 4 Mil Std 1913 rails, the Battle Mug starts life as a 13.5 pound! solid block of 6061 T6 billet aluminum before it enters a state of the art CNC facility. What comes out is a 24 ounce tankard that screams warrior. The idea came about over beers and a conversation about a pile of removable M4 carrying handles.

Battle Mug has been used in a variety of ways; to commemorate commissioning, to honor others and hail & farewells, and as gifts for loved ones.

Battle Mug is Made in USA and can be customized in a variety of ways including various finishes. Additionally, the Picatinny rails will accept any number of accessories, including those pesky M4 carrying handles which make tipping back a brew or two a snap.

To order yours, visit www.battlemug.com

Originally posted on Soldier Systems Daily.